A Journey with Our Son: Navigating Life with Autism

By Vinnie and Mark Smith

A young man smiling while seated in the passenger's seat of a car.

At 35 years old, our son Peter is a remarkable young man living with autism. As his parents, we have embarked on an unexpected journey. Diagnosed at the tender age of two, we were fortunate to access early interventions and services tailored to his needs. Yet, despite this support, there are moments when it feels like something is inherently broken, leaving us with a sense of helplessness.

If I were to offer guidance to parents of young adults with autism, I would say: prepare yourself for a journey that is unlike anything you could ever have imagined. There will be stretches of smooth sailing filled with indescribable joy, alongside detours that lead to heartbreak, disillusionment, and rejection. You will traverse bridges, build connections, and witness some crumble along the way. Anxiety and fear will often cast shadows on the road ahead.

Throughout this journey, you will meet extraordinary individuals who will uplift you with their kindness. These compassionate souls will walk alongside you, offering support during the most challenging times. Conversely, you may also encounter those who struggle to understand, despite their good intentions. Their words may inadvertently highlight the stigma surrounding disabilities.

As a family, you will work diligently to carve out quality time for each member while addressing everyone's unique needs. Balancing your marriage and personal time may feel like a juggling act, yet you will find ways to celebrate the special qualities that make your family unique. Though your journey may not mirror anyone else's, it will be profoundly yours, and you will navigate it together.

You will learn to prioritize, make sacrifices, and accept that life can sometimes be unfair. There will be moments when you question why this path has been laid before you and your child. However, you will not dwell on these thoughts for long; instead, you will gather your resolve and press forward. Along this journey, you will navigate various milestones: school, work, and social opportunities. Advocacy and protection will become second nature, but equally important will be empowering your loved one to find their own way.

In many unexpected ways, you will witness the world becoming kinder, more accepting, and more inclusive. You will discover strengths you never knew you possessed as you embrace this lifelong responsibility. While this journey can be daunting, even perilous at times, it will also reveal some of the most breathtaking vistas through the eyes of your loved one. In those moments, you may find yourself filled with gratitude for this distinctive journey.

Through all my experiences, I have come to understand that the road ahead will continue to surprise and inspire me. It can be a beautiful journey, a beautiful life, if you choose to embrace it.

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